I first met Dexter and his guardians, Dan and Phillipa, six years ago when Dexter was a kitten. His constant chattering and forever in motion was making him impossible to be around. No way would they return Dexter to the pound. But I had to help them tame him. My diagnosis was that it was single cat syndrome. The introduction of a playful kitten would relieve Dexter's angst and their discomfort. No, another cat was not an option for them at this time. Perhaps later if all else failed. So I gave them a behavioral program to help the three of them to cope. One of my suggestions was to invite a friend or neighbor with a dog who was cat-friendly. While the dog was at a distance on his or her lead, Dexter would be fascinated and later the two could play together. This would work out some of Dexter's energy and ease his frustration. Another tip was to have a neighbor's child play with Dexter.

They were able to follow my suggested program and build on it. A couple of neighbors worked at home and fell in love with Dexter. So he provided apartment therapy. Yes, he divided his day so he could hang out with these people who played with him and treated him royally. When his guardians returned home from work each evening, he was deliciously relaxed after a fun day of work.

I recently received this photo of Dexter. Now he has a full time in home job as Baby Emily's Nanny. Before Emily arrived one of my recommendations was to make a tape of a crying baby and stroke Dexter while the baby cried because the cries would be culture shock to the three of them.

I later received a progress report that all was going well but Dexter was now in Emily's crib and was it ok. I suggested that they fix up Emily's former little crib for Dexter and put it nearby her crib. As we spoke, they said; ''Dexter has jumped out of the crib and he's next to us by the phone.'' I had them turn on speakerphone and he had recognized my voice from his therapy tapes of his home sessions.

Help! I am at my wits end. I have an eleven-months-old cat. We kept him in the house at first and let him out a month ago. He is free to wander in and out because we have a cat door. I am now at my wits end. He started off great, coming in to eat and sleeping and being in the house so that we could close the door to keep him safe for the night. We would let him out in the morning. Now he is staying out all night. When I call him he does not respond. He runs from me when I try to feed him. My parents and I are at our wits end. We do not know what to do. We have another cat who is 4 years old. He comes in to go to sleep for the night. But our younger one is just wandering all night. He runs when we try to feed him. He is hungry because he will stay outside and cry. When I take the food outside to him he runs. I am so frustrated.' How do I break these two behaviors?

~ Jean Maire


Dear Guardian Jean Maire,

What a rascal! For now he needs his own restricted outdoor space so he can't call the shots. You can attach a run to the kitty door so his jaunts are limited. You might want to check out the Kittywalk system that can be attached to the kitty door or serve as a separate unit. Log on to www.kittywalk.com or phone 1-877-844-4438. You may have to set up another exit and entrance for your reliable cat.

As your 'wanderer' gets older, he may become more reliable but it's not a given. I'll assume that both of your cats are already neutered. I'm happy to give you a practical solution.

We have a 9 years old cat that has diabetes and needs two injections of insulin a day. Every time we travel and leave him we have had a problem. One time he was in a kennel and he wouldn't eat, and went to the bathroom in the cage. He developed dehydration and we had to bring him to the vet to get him back on track. This last time we decided to keep him home and have our son-in-law (who our cat likes) give him his shots. Well, he would start hiding and when our son-in-law caught him he would hiss and growl and even bite him. He also went to the bathroom in different areas of the house. Is there something we can do so he is not so stressed?

~ Thank you, Louise


Dear Guardian Louise,

The best solution would be to arrange for your cat to stay at the vets where he can get the medical attention he needs. If you want him to remain at home to be visited and treated, sequester him in a sunny room with all of his comforts so he feels safe. My book, THE TOTAL CAT, Quill, will give you detailed information when to travel without your cat.

Dear Carole,

We have an un-neutered black tomcat, which we actually adopted a few years ago when he turned up outside our house and stayed for several days sleeping at the backdoor. For a male tom he does not spray inside the house and he is generally well-behaved and he is very affectionate towards us. Although he can naturally be aggressive to other male cats.

We are looking to adopt a kitten and would like your advice. Do you feel our cat would be able to interact with a male or female kitten? We have not neutered the tom because we are wary his original guardian could turn up. Some years ago we took in a female tabby, registered her at the vets and repeatedly changed her collar. Eighteen months on we were informed the cat already had another guardian, so we are reluctant to have him neutered. Our cat can disappear but generally he spends a large proportion of his time within the confines of our house and garden and he is very affectionate towards us. Any advice would be gratefully received.

~ SF


Dear Guardian SF,

Your tom sounds like a terrific cat and what a lucky mutual find. I understand your reluctance to possibly neuter someone else's cat. But it's the very best option even though his behavior is that of a low-key tom. A neutered male roams even less, can't impregnate females, fights other toms and usually lives much longer than an intact male. So far, you've been fortunate, but you can't count on continued good fortune. If his original guardian should appear, your tom will have been benefited by his un-tom status.

The introduction of a new kitten could cause your tom to spray more, roam even more and to become aggressive. Wait at least two weeks after his surgery before you introduce a kitten. Either sex would be fine but a playful kitten would do best with your former tom. You can refer to March 22, in my archives or my book THE TOTAL CAT for my intro. Here's to continued fun.