Carole is available for bi-coastal house calls, speaking engagements anywhere, phone consults nationally and internationally. She also sees patients by appointment at Westside Veterinary Center in Manhattan. Her newly-released book (Dec. 2007) is The Complete Guide To Understanding And Caring For Your Cat. Her recently released CD of spoken cat advice and soothing music is Caring For Your Cat, The Wilbourn Way.
Come back to Carole's home page monthly for cat news and Carole's most recent replies to behavior inquiries from worried cat guardians. To have this home page emailed to you after the story update, click here. You will receive this exact page by email, and it will link you to the other pages in her site, and to the rest of the IDA web site.
CATS ON THE COUCH, October ’08
THE MESSAGE IS IN THE SUBTEXT
Yes, that’s my cat, Orion, hanging out with a service dog he
met at a benefit he participated in. He has a terrific rapport with dogs. That may be because he lived at a rescue facility with many, many cats. I was told he never sought out any feline company, but preferred people. As T.S. Eliot said, “A cat is a cat, and a dog is a dog.” So , because a dog is not a cat, Orion doesn’t relive that previous rivalry. A dog is a welcome visitor in his life.
WHAT ABOUT A NAME CHANGE?
Hello Carole Wilbourn,
How do you feel about changing a cat’s name, and will it affect the cat?
Thanks in advance,
Danielle
Dear Guardian Danielle,
A cat can be affected by a change of name—especially if the particular cat is very sensitive to human body language and tone of voice. If you’re thinking of giving your cat a new name, choose one that makes you feel good when you say it. This positive feeling will be passed on to your cat. If you choose a name that has an unpleasant or demeaning connotation, your body and voice will communicate a negative feeling.
If you feel that a change of name will give your cat a boost or change of image, carry on.
BONZO IS TERRIFIED OF KAHLUA
Hi Carole,
The other day I came home to find my front door wide open. My cat, Kahlua, was in my living room. She looked terrified. Bonzo, her companion, was no where in sight. I immediately panicked. Maybe he’d gone outside! The wind was blowing, the dogs next door were barking, and I was freaking out. Suddenly, Kahlua headed towards my son’s room with me right behind her. She crouched down beside my son’s bed and growled, and growled, and growled. Sure enough Bonzo was under the bed. After scads of attention, they appeared to be recovered.
But the next afternoon, the plot thickened. While they were hanging out together, there was a strange noise on the TV. They dashed across the room. Once again, Kahlua started to growl at Bonzo, and he ran for cover. We finally had to separate them. How can we get them together again? What happened to my happy cats? Will they ever be the same?
Thanks,
Rachel
Hello Guardian Rachel,
Never fear! Your two guys should recover. The drama all started when the door blew open. Your cats became sensitized by the nearness of the blowing wind and barking dogs. The threat of this major culture shock caused Kahlua to turn on Bonzo. He became her tension target. She blamed him for her angst. They were on the way to recovery but the strange noise from the TV caused a repeat performance. Here are some recommendations to defuse the tension and reinvent their former relationship:
- Start off by having your front door fixed so there isn’t a repeat performance.
- While they are separated, at intervals, you can make some loud noises. You might drop a few books on the floor, bang a couple of pots together, play the TV at a loud volume or create any sudden sound to startle them. As you’re doing this, have soft music playing in the background to cushion and distract them from the startling sounds, while members of your family can be consoling them. The idea is to build their resistance to sudden noises, while you’re giving them support, so they become desensitized and don’t over react in the future.
- When you feel they have calmed down, engage then in play together, and offer them some of their favorite treats. Before they become agitated, separate them again. Repeat this process until they can sustain normal interactions without a setback.
- Reassure them. Tell them everything’s okay. The sound of your voice and relaxed body language will ease their underlying tension
Rachel, you might want to purchase one of IDA’s Guardian shirts to celebrate your relationship with your two guys. Here’s to peace!
OUR PIPPI IS IN MOURNING
Hello Carole,
We recently had to have Patch, our 15 year old cat, put down.
She was the surrogate mother and playmate of Pippi who’s five. Our poor Pippi is now in mourning. She’s lethargic and sleeps a lot. We are giving her extra love and making a point of one of us being here at all times so she doesn’t feel abandoned by us, too.
It's tearing our hearts out to see Pippi, our intelligent, active, and playful cat so depressed. She and Patch were always together. We feel the best solution is to introduce a young kitten into the household or should it be two kittens or maybe an older cat?
Thank you for any help you can give us about this.
L & R Kennedy
Hello Guardians L.& R.,
Your Pippi is a young cat and would probably do well with a 12 week old or older kitten. An adolescent or older cat that was very cat-oriented –preferred cats to people—would, also, be a good match. If the newcomer was the same color or had some of Patch’s coloring, Pippi would be more accepting. Arrange for someone Pippi doesn’t know to escort the newcomer in. You could refer to my book for more information on how to introduce the newcomer.
On behalf of IDA, I’m so very sorry about your Patch, but she’s safe and at rest now
QUESTIONS TO CAROLE
If you have a question for Carole, you can email her at thecattherapist@idausa.org. We’re sorry that Carole won’t be able to answer all questions, but the answers to many questions can be found in her IDA archives.
Oscar the Cat Predicts Death
Oscar is the feline resident at a nursing home in Providence, Rhode Island who seems to have predicted the deaths of 25 of the residents. In case after case, when he has curled up next to someone, it usually means they have less than four hours of life left. I was interviewed about Oscar by NBC-TV. Read all about Oscar on their site. To watch my video, click here.
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